Deny, Deny, Deny!

So I walk into the kitchen and cornstarch slurry is drizzled all over. All over the wood floor, the counters, down the front of the stove and dried drips all over our dark wood cabinets.

DECLAN!! 

He reports to the kitchen with a thin layer of cornstarch on his clothes.  Front and back.  Despite this, the most damning of circumstantial evidence, he threw his hands up and absolutely insisted he had no knowledge of the cause of the mess. Curiously though, he did immediately offer to clean it up.

When I am in the looney bin blathering about non-Newtonian liquid, I am relying on you, my friends, to smuggle me liquor...